Tag Archives: republican

Opinion  /  April 2, 2013  / 

Offering an Alternative

“Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you,” said Peter Dinklage’s character, a clever dwarf in HBO’s Game of Thrones. Sage advice for complex times. But what might it be like to wear your identity like armor? One might consider translating that into advice for three great institutions facing great challenges—one in business, one in religion, and one in politics. In Silicon Valley, Apple Inc. struggles to compete with Samsung. As its stock has fallen over 30% in the last six months, Apple wonders whether to submit to growing shareholder demands that it reduce its huge cash pile and start paying out bigger dividends. In the Vatican, the Catholic Church struggles with much of the Western world. Led by a new pope, the Church finds itself in sharp contradiction with popular secular positions … Continue reading

Opinion  /  February 26, 2013  / 

The Tall Tale Of Chuck Hagel

Let me begin by framing the absurdity. President Obama nominates Republican Chuck Hagel for Secretary of Defense. Really?  He couldn’t find a single Democrat willing or able to take the job? Okay, fine. We’ll accept one absurdity.  But there’s more. The Republican Party says no. Really?  Would they rather have a Democrat doing the job?  Because it’s absurd to think that Obama will appoint someone more conservative—although with absurdity popping up all over, I suppose that assumption could be made. But there’s more. Why does the Republican Party say no?  Two of the most often cited reasons: because they’re afraid Hagel sympathizes with something called the “Friends of Hamas” and something else called the “Junior League of Hezbollah,” and because they want to continue to hit the President over Benghazi. Really?  Because about 30 seconds after this “Friends of Hamas” story broke (on Breitbart.com, which is a conservative blog that … Continue reading

Opinion  /  November 12, 2012  / 

How the GOP Stole Christmas

“This liberal opposition has just got to stop!” Shouted the furious, put-upon Gop, “The natural order suffers awful distortions, Like health reform, gay marriage, safe, legal abortions, Environmental regs favored by the Lorax, And, worst of all, rich people asked to pay tax!” The Gop, you can see, was very distraught, So he sat, and he thought, and he thought, and he thought. That’s when the Gop had an idea. An awful idea. A wonderful, terrible, rule-changing idea. “I’ll buy the election!” the Gop gave a shout, “With unlimited corporate money, we’ll surely win out!” So he put on his suit, and he went to the Court, And he made an argument of the following sort: “This campaign spending, limiting law Features an unconstitutional flaw. For each person first has the right to make speeches To convince America what the right sort of Sneetch is, And money and speech are … Continue reading

Opinion  /  April 11, 2012  / 

A Bunch of (Mostly) White Guys

I’ve been told that this is to be my last column this year, so I wanted to make it a super good one. Unfortunately, the little squirrel hostage I keep in my apartment who writes my columns and takes my finals for me (while stacked on top of ten other squirrels and wearing a trench coat for in-class exams) has caught a serious case of squirrel leprosy, so I am afraid this column will fail to meet most/any of your expectations. Now that we’ve pretty much decided to stop humoring Santorum and recognize that Mittens is inevitably the nominee (notwithstanding some deus ex machina) of the Republican Party, it’s time to start taking bets as to who Mitt will pick for VP. General consensus is Rob Portman, although there are always murmurings about Marco Rubio and Chris Christie. Let’s talk about these guys, and then I will share with you … Continue reading