LAWKER Dishes Dirt at HLS

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Female Empowerment… and Pink Tiaras

Move aside Catherine MacKinnon, here comes the Vie Society, the “first female social organization at HLS” dedicated to “beauty, strength, and power.” You know you’re onto something when the first value listed in the mission statement of a society dedicated to female empowerment is “beauty.” This week, founders Angela Kim, Angela Yingling, and Jamie Bartholomew sent out an exclusive e-mail inviting prospective members to join them at their “Princess Party” hosted at Cabot House. But just in case you were thinking of showing up, ugly girl in section three, the Vie Society regrets that it is “only able to accept a limited number of phenomenal females into [its] organization.” We all knew something was missing at the law school: a sorority. Lawker is already anticipating the makeover sleepovers and field trips to Jasmine Sola. Luckily after selecting their members, the group plans to get down to serious business. The first event features “pink champagne and tiaras.” The dress code? “Princess chic.”Honest. We couldn’t make this up if we tried.

Berk for Pres in 2024

Apparently the Berkowitz campaign is already kicking into high gear, and only two full decades early. Upon finding out that he was to be parodied as “Ben-d-the-truth Berkowitz” in this year’s HLS Parody, Ben did more than complain to friend and producer Matt Smith. Lawker spotted him storming into a dress rehearsal, demanding that the name be changed to protect his reputation and political future. Ben, do you really think anyone’s gonna remember the 2005 Parody twenty years from now? It’s been a week and already no one cares. We know you’ve worked hard to gain your sterling reputation, but come on… get some perspective.

Montrose Spa to Stop Supporting Entire Porn Industry

The owners of Montrose Spa, our favorite on-campus deli and claustrophobe’s nightmare, are bending to pressure from a group of irate HLS students armed with legalese and entirely too much free time on their hands. Clearly, protesting a small owner-operated convenience store in the heart of Cambridge is really going to show the fat cats of Big Porn just who’s calling the shots.

In an eloquent e-mail sent to garner support for their crusade, protest organizers Mary Anne Franks and Diane Rosenfeld noted that they have already initiated negotiations with the owner, who had the temerity to fear that ditching the girlie mags might mean upsetting part of his clientele. But for those who rely on Montrose Spa for its “legitimate” products, have no fear. Montrose will be just fine. For as Diane and Mary point out in their e-mail, “instead of losing business, he will actually benefit from the patronization of customers who previously wouldn’t shop in his store.” That’s right…the moral masses who have stayed away for so long might once more be able to safely purchase their Lady Greys and vitaminwater without those pesky temptations of the flesh getting in the way. We don’t know how this will end, but needless to say, the editors of Lawker are already stocking up on issues of PowerBallin’ and Shaved.

What’s Larry’s Secret?

In a recent e-mail to his Con Law class, Professor Laurence Tribe made cryptic references to the ongoing plagiarism controversy, as if to suggest that something is going on behind-the-scenes. On his depiction in last week’s Parody, Tribe was unusually brief: “The only thing I’ve heard that I wish I could comment on but don’t feel free to say anything about just yet is the business of my supposedly copying some passages from somebody’s work without sufficiently crediting the original author.” Tribe ended the email with: “Hopefully I’ll be free to satisfy whatever curiosity you might have about it before the semester ends.”

No word yet on whether Charlie Nesson has yet e-mailed his class to explain the Parody’s reference to his having gotten “the munchies.”

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Lawker Stalker

This week’s celebrity sightings are a bit sparse-Lawker can only be in so many places at once. Readers-send in your sightings!

Saw Professor Bruce Hay at Starbucks on the corner of Massachusetts Ave. and Shepard St. He ordered a Toffee Nut Crème and proceeded to toy around on his Powerbook for an hour or so. A couple of students went over to say hi, but he didn’t seem very interested in chatting.

Anonymous Lawyer Jeremy Blachman was standing in front of me on line at the Hark. He was buying a salad and almost knocked over my tray with his orange backpack.

I was at a late lunch at Henrietta’s Table when I ran into William Shatner. I congratulated him on his performance on “Boston Legal” and he thanked me for mentioning that show instead of Star Trek. We chatted for a minute or two, but he seemed obsessed with my female companion.

Rumor Has It…

Olivia Wilde, the actress playing the hot blonde lesbian on Fox’s “The O.C.,” was born Olivia Cockburn. Could she actually be the sister of 1L Chloe Cockburn? Lawker seems to think so. And before we forget, 2L Lisa Joy is currently dating Memento writer Jonathan Nolan, who is busy working on a new screenplay in L.A.

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