SURVIVOR UpDate

BY

There he was. Hunched by the muddy bank of a mosquito swollen river, Nick pointed casually downstream to the scantily clad Elisabeth. He said something about a pig … that was all it took to send Mike off, knife in hand, to commune with the spirit of Jimmy Dean. Nick took in the killing with the seasoned detachment of a Crim Law professor, yet he melted when recounting the story to the other members of Kucha. It was the nastiest thing he’d ever seen, Nick admitted, apparently forgetting all about Gropius showers.

The following week, Nick was the hero of Kucha’s reward challenge. Dragging the limp bodies of his tribe around, Nick was the heart of a concerted effort to once again make those Ogakor kids cry.

Later, Nick choked the chicken while Rodger readied the axe. The muted screams of poultry echoed through the camp, no doubt still hauntning Harvard’s courageous fowl slayer to this very day.

Too bad they failed in the immunity challenge … then again, Kimmi was fodder for Kucha’s heavy guns. Nick voted the whiny vegetarian off with nary a wince. That’s right folks, it will only make the tribe stronger.

Next week, someone gets chomped by a croc. Here’s guessing it ain’t Nick – spies from the Hemenway Outback say that he’s looking decidedly unscathed, but no one doubts that he looks tasty enough.

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