Sportsguy

BY IAN HUMMEL

October has arrived and once again the attention of the sports world has turned to HLS intramural football. There were games on September 30, but the sports world wasn’t interested in them, so we turn directly to October 7 and Week 2.

In the much anticipated “Game of the Week,” once top-ranked Mr. Sparkle (2-1) faced undefeated Duress (2-0). The game had all the hallmarks of exciting football: arguments about what down it was, abounding penalities and, of course, low scoring. When the dust cleared, Duress prevailed 7-6. The victory was due in part to the effort of DB Trevor, who knocked away a pass at the risk of being impaled on the tent that inexplicably sits in the middle of Field 2. Less impressive was flanker Wade, who dropped a first-down pass and quit the team. For the losers, a strong performance was given by Mr. Sparkle’s two-way sensation, Tom Simek. Also notable for Sparkle was Karl Fanter, who blamed himself for the loss, a sentiment with which his teammates readily agreed.

In other action, the International All-Stars (2-1), in an attempt to impress the voters, gave no quarter to the JLPP Patriots (0-3) in a 48-0 romp. The Patriots, discouraged, decided to disband and join other teams. David Marshall, the All-Stars captain, wanted to thank the fans and “send out a shout to the family dog, Goober,” who is presently undergoing surgery.

Riding high from a convincing win by forfeit, the AstroGliders (2-0) defeated Black By Popular Demand (0-1) 20-14. The Gliders’ Brian Lutz had a big game, scoring two touchdowns and picking off two passes. Evan Belosa deserves commendation for his QB work, as does Wes Warren for his game-ending interception. “FINALLY! FINALLY!” exulted one AstroGlider after the victory over long-time rival BBPD. It was refreshing to hear one player who understands just how important flag football is.Animals Taste Good (1-1) “eeked by the undermanned but overtalented Sashi’s Team (2-1), 32-30,” reported Animals captain Eric Zacks. Leading the Animals were Matthew Zisow with three touchdown receptions and Adam Henslovitz, whose catches were said to be inspirational. John Mello, forsaking his surname, provided vicious pass rush. The game went the distance, with Sashi’s Team having a chance to tie the game with a two-point conversion, but the attempt was batted down by a diving Dan Bennett of the Animals.

Section VII Deadly Sins (0-2) took a 6-0 lead into halftime against the undefeated Boar Hogs (2-0) with a defense likened to a pack of ugly, rabid dogs. But the Boar Hogs broke out in the second half and came away with a 26-22 victory. Details of the game remain a mystery, but it was reported that Boar Hog Kwaku Akowah had a big game in Week 1, so I can only assume that he must have done something good in Week 2.

In the other games, the Fightin’ Greg Lippers (1-2) shutout the Mad Turtles (1-2) 18-0. Sashi’s Team rebounded from their close loss in their first game and defeated the Fightin’ Greg Lippers 27-18.

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